Ok…
I’ve been terrible about updating here. I think its just … I’m in an extended rut and a few things have just all finally piled on. I haven’t been creative in terms of photography, I haven’t written here, I havent made progress on making friends. I won’t delve in to the friend thing other than to say. I havent made a new friend in about a year now. I can count the number of friends on one hand. I have got to change that.
I feel somewhat beaten. I’m really, really, really, ready for that change I’ve said I’m ready for a bunch of times now. I go to work, get through it, and come home exhausted. I don’t sleep well. Wash, rinse, repeat. I *am* trying to fix it all though. I’m actively seeking change and trying to bring it about. What sucks is that its in other people’s hands for certain parts of it and there isn’t a damn thing I can do other than wait. As far as other things, I’m at least actively seeking the change AND, after a decades worth of terrible sleep, I am finally going to a sleep clinic. I’m hoping that this will fix my issue with always being tired and, with more energy, I’ll get out a bit more. We’ll see.
In terms of change, I’ll just throw it out that I’ve been actively seeking a new job. I just don’t think the change I want is going to come to my current job. I love my work … but the leadership is just … not what I would have hoped. I’ll leave it at that. I’ve tried giving feedback and everything, but sometimes, you can’t make the impact you want because it involves another person. The sad part is that I’m not alone in feeling that way. I hear so much from others in my organization about how they’re just waiting for change now. Well, I have to make a change for myself or I fear I’ll either go through the motions and be beat or my work will greatly suffer. Neither of those sounds great to me, so I’m working on it.
God this post is extremely scattered. I spent today working on a paper that took entirely too long to write. I’m excited to be so close to finished with my Masters degree! In about six weeks, I’ll be wrapping up classes. 
Then i can work on certifications and finally get my nights and weekends back!
So, um, I have no good way to end this post. I’m hoping for a lot of positive stuff in the next 30 – 60 days so I can begin a new chapter all around.